Raising a puppy is a tremendous task, at least if you want to do it right. There’s the potty training, house manners and the ever important socialization. Having raised 10 puppies from 8 weeks (and now two from birth), I am very experienced in taking on the task. Aside from my own personal experience, I was one of the first CPDT’s in Virginia back in 2003. And as a licensed vet tech, I worked in a practice with a veterinarian whose area of expertise was behavior and I was her trusted assistant. I taught puppy classes, obedience classes and did private consultations. I’ve been to seminars and studied books from Ian Dunbar, Karen Pryor, Patricia McConnell, Suzanne Clothier, Pat Miller and more. I feel confident in my ability to raise a well-rounded and properly socialized puppy. And yet here I am, on my 11th puppy, and feel like I have failed her miserably.
I brought Surf into the world, with her littermates, and was there for her very first breath. I did insane amounts of homework, choose parents with truly exceptional temperments, and raised the litter to the absolute best of my ability. Looking back, I think there is only one experience the puppies had that I would change. Surf was one of the more thoughtful pups in the litter, but confident, brave and happy. At 9 weeks, we took Surf and her sister Una to the beach---they acted like they owned it. So happy to explore, meet people, jump in the sound to swim, and chase seafoam. Nothing phased them at all. We took them both to puppy class as well, and while neither girl was interested in playing with other pups, there was no fear just disinterest. When all her littermates left, and we finally had time alone together to train, she was happy, playful and engaged.
And then the bad stuff started. At Thanksgiving, we went to the beach again and I was so excited to take her back. She was 11 weeks old at the time, and I suspect in a fear period. The first day we were there, I decided to take her down the beach without my other dogs for a socialization and play outing. I loaded up on treats and toys and we headed down the road to the beach. Not 20 feet from the driveway, a pitbull pops out from behind a grassy dune and charges us. He was on a leash, but the owner was clearly unprepared for his dog to take off as he was dragged to us with the dog growling and snapping. I scooped Surf up just in time to keep her out of harm’s way, as the owner of the pitbull attempted to gain control. And then it got worse---the owner was carrying a baton with him (clearly the dog was very dog aggressive as we saw the owner carrying the baton every time he walked him all weekend). And he started beating his dog on the chest and torso, screaming at him. I was horrified and literally ran down to the beach, both me and Surf completely shaken. I put Surf down and went to grab for my cookies, when about 30 seconds later, 6 kids came running on the beach from behind the dunes directly behind us and headed in our direction. By this point, Surf is no longer in a state where she can think. She was just full of fear with adrenaline pumping through her body. She did everything she could to escape—from the kids and from me. So I took her back to the house from a different direction than we came.
The next day I couldn’t even get her to walk back to the beach. But she was able to walk around the yard and play with the other dogs outside. When we drove her to a soundside beach, she was relaxed and happy though she didn’t see any other people or dogs on the outing. Over the remaining days at the beach, I tried to avoid all dogs and only walked her with our other dogs for confidence. On the last day there, I found a lovely standard poodle walking on the beach with her owner and asked if I could run back to get my puppy to provide a potentially positive experience. She walked back to the house with us and when I brought Surf out, she was very scared of the poodle, even though I brought Stash out with us who is always happy to meet new dogs. I let Surf decide if she wanted to approach and just chatted with the owner. Over the course about 20 minutes, she finally started engaging with the poodle. And we ended it after a few minutes and left it at that.
Upon getting home from our time at the beach, I immediately put out an APB for puppy friendly dogs to have dates with. Surf was very scared meeting any new dog, but would relax quickly and be submissive if they were calm and relaxed. I also spent time at our animal hospital where I worked on just counter conditioning her to the presence of new dogs, without any potential for interaction. She sat on dog bed in the corner and every time a new dog came in, she got cookies.
Two weeks after our beach incident, I headed to a trial in North Carolina with Surf, Gypsy and Rival. We stayed at Kristen’s house (she has Gypsy’s littermate Envy) and Surf kept her distance from Envy and Callie. Surf did GREAT at the trial. I did not ask her to meet any dogs, just eat treats and play. She was completely relaxed ringside. On Sunday, while walking all three dogs near the ring, a springer spaniel was standing with his owner about 8 feet from us. We walked by them on our way to the potty area, with Surf closest to the dog. As we passed, the springer turned around and lunged at us, coming to the end of his leash and getting within a foot of Surf. At which point, she freaked out and jumped in front of me and I tripped on her and fell onto the gravel driveway on top of her. Yup, setback number one. The rest of the day, she was pretty pretty nervous and was happy to get back to the safety of the car.
Once home, we resumed Operation Find Friendly dogs. And it went well for a few weeks. She had to assess the dog before approaching but then would willing interact. I attempted to take her to puppy class for some socialization around pups her age, but we wound up being in a class of 20 puppies, in a very tight space and it totally backfired….she just could not get enough distance from the many, many pups to be comfortable. It was completely overwhelming for me, and in retrospect I should have just left. But instead we sat in a closet, and I just rewarded her for looking at the other pups through the expen that blocked the door to the closet. Boy did we look like the remedial students. After class though, we met up with one of the pups outside, a lovely golden retriever boy and he and Surf played and played for about 20 minutes. It was great!! And right after that she met my sisters dog, Java, who is her aunt too and they instantly loved each other. So I was encouraged that she was still able to make friends.
After Christmas, we headed down to Charleston to see Surf’s brother Surge. She was elated to see him and was content to meet Sarah’s other dog Q, who has good dog skills. Everything was going swimmingly, until a man with a huge intact male Labrador had his dog off leash walking down the street and it beelined for us. He meant no harm, but Surf did not know that and his approach was swift and forward. Scared puppy. AGAIN.
The first week in January, I took Surf along to Gypsy’s agility class to hang out. When we walked in the door, a JRT who was off leash, ran over to Surf and jumped her. This time, contact was made and she had two small puncture wounds on her neck. Fortunately, Gypsy jumped on him and chased him across the room like a good sister. At this point, Surf is officially traumatized. She could no longer function in the building. No one or nothing is safe. It’s at this point when she lost all trust in me as well. I was now associated with ALL of her bad experiences, and most involved yelling and screaming by other people, so now all people were scary too. I cried all the way home. So sad for my puppy and for what all these experiences had done to her. She was now a very different puppy than the one I had at 10 weeks. Her confidence gone, she was cautious of everything and everyone, and she was not looking to me for guidance or protection. Later that week, I took her on an outing to the pet store, someone called her a “sheepish” sheepdog and it broke my heart. I got her back in the car and just cried.
I tried to continue providing her with some positive experiences, and she somehow still made friends. But I stopped pushing as hard and didn’t constantly seek out dogs for her to interact with. In February, I met up with a former student who has two lovely Berners. And silly me, I thought it might be nice for Surf to meet one. Unfortunately , they were both let out of the car at the same time, off leash, and came running full speed across the parking lot at Surf, making loud noises like Berners do. They meant no harm, but that was the nail in the coffin for Surf---she peed on herself, screamed and ran to a hiding spot. In her mind, they were bears approaching and she was most certainly going to be killed. Talk about making bad decision after bad decision for my sweet puppy.
About two weeks after that, I had her at Gypsy’s agility class again, where we had made some progress thanks to two awesome male border collies there. Surf adores them and they gave her much needed confidence. After class when she was playing with them, a lab came over to say hi and when Surf approached her cautiously, the lab growled at her as she flipped upside down, and the lab kept growling until I got Surf out of there.
At this point, I stopped taking her too many places for a few weeks. She just needed to stay home, and go for walks with dogs that were her friends. Thankfully, she loves her BC best friend Lilly as well as her lab buddy, Bella so she gets to be social. It's also great that two of Surf's littermates, Frisco and Nixie, don't live too far away and they get to see each other pretty regularly. She's super confident with them, maybe too much so!, and they all adore each other. I think that's really played a part in keeping her dogs skills in place. More than anything though, I have needed to re-establish a trusting relationship with her, if possible. Around the same time, Gypsy got hurt so we stopped going to agility class, so Surf hasn’t been back to the building.
We attempted to participate in two seminars in the building where she was attacked---one in February and one in March. The February one was very, very hard for her. She was hyper vigilant about the other dogs, not focused much on working and happy to just be in her crate rather than out playing. In March, she was better and it helped that her brother Frisco was there too, so she felt a bit more secure. But she still wasn’t super happy to work or play and I could see that the other dogs barking and whining in crates really affected her.
The other big challenge during this time was Surf’s lack of food drive. It didn’t matter what treats I had, she just was not that interested in them. Her play drive has always been much higher, but when a dog is in a fearful or vigilant state, they find it very hard to play while also scanning the environment for possible danger. So I had no high value reinforcers to reward her with. That has improved greatly as she’s gotten older and she likes food quite well now.
One thing I have tried very, very hard to do the last few months is to let her tell me if she’s okay with a situation and if not, she gets to leave it. It’s all about her consent; I need her to feel like she has some control over what she does. Especially since she doesn’t always trust me to make the right decisions. I have worked much harder on her socialization with people than dogs. Because of all the trauma, she became wary of people. She has never cared for people leaning over her to pet her, and all the trauma made it much worse. At this point, she’s recovered from it well and enjoys meeting people, thankfully.
I’ve spent a bit of time counter conditioning leaning over her and getting into her space as well. She has always been very pressure sensitive. Part of me wonders how much her very high herding instinct factors in to that. Because she’s also very pressure sensitive on sheep too. Rave and Gypsy are what I would call “space invaders”. They have very little respect for my personal space. Surf has a much greater natural respect for my space. I’ve actually had to teach her to come into me, jump on me, and just come into my space. She happily jumps all over me and shoves toys in my face now! I also encouraged her to jump on new people---a habit that most people hate in their dogs, but by jumping on someone she felt like she was in more control and it lets me know how she’s feeling about the interaction. I’d rather her jump on people than be scared of them!
Surf is now nine months old. I constantly think about what she would be like if we had not gone through all the bad experiences. I watch her littermates, so exuberant and full of confidence, and wonder. Again, she was one of the more thoughtful pups, so she was always going to think before acting. But after reading Patricia McConnell’s new book “The Education of Will” and talking to my vet, it’s clear that early trauma can actually change how a brain functions, how the neurons fire. And likely her brain has been “rewired” over the last six months.
All that said, I am in awe of my girl. I think if Gypsy had gone through what Surf has, I would have a neurotic dog on my hands. But Surf’s recovery has amazed me. By some miracle, still enjoys meeting new dogs, though carefully. She truly loves being around her doggie friends and likes making new ones. I don’t know how she does it! I started taking her to a beginner agility class 6 weeks ago, not because I need help with the equipment but to keep growing her confidence. The class was in a new location and there would be other dogs in a very controlled setting. The instructor knew our situation and was willing to accommodate us in any way. Turns out she is the star of the class! Great toy play, good food motivation, happy to ignore the other dogs, and even willing to greet them outside. The only issue we’ve had is when other dogs bark in the crate---she just does not want to be crated next to them and gets a bit worried when they start barking or whining loudly. And I can totally understand that---she has no idea if that is going to preempt an attack. Surf rocked all the obstacles and exercises we have worked on and started dragging me into the building. She also got charged by a huge lab, through a fence, and she held her ground and while she layed down submissively, she was not scared! To me, it was a huge milestone and the sign that she was in full recovery mode.
I have no doubt that we will still need to work through some issues, but I am amazed at her progress so far. And while we are still working on our relationship, and I am trying to rebuild her trust, we have come a long way. Even off leash in class, she has great focus on me. Taking her herding has also helped her confidence tremendously. Interestingly, or maybe not, she trusts all dogs when in a herding environment. She greets dogs at the farm with great confidence and joy. It’s very, very different at agility. She’s never had a negative experience herding. And herding dogs tend to be in a far less aroused state than agility dogs. Surf loves working sheep, and I am enjoy learning with her, so I think we will keep working at it and see where it takes us. I just adore my baby girl and want her to see the world as a place full of adventure and fun.
I am grateful for her amazing dogs skills in our pack. Surf is brilliant at reading the other dogs. She's very respectful of her housemates in general, though still has a puppy license and gets away with a lot, especially with momma Rave. She adores her sister Gypsy, thinks Rival hung the moon, and knows who the just stay away from. She loves to kiss the faces of the dogs she respects the most---and they tolerate it, for now!
I hope that a year from now, I won’t even remember all she has gone through—that this is a long lost chapter in the story of her life. And I’ll keep building her up the best I can to get her there in the hopes that she thinks she rules the world one day. Which is why I know call her Super Surf! :-)
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